How to Be There for a Friend After a Devastating House Fire

Having lived through the devastation of a wildfire in Colorado, I’ve come to deeply appreciate the profound impact of kindness during the toughest of times. Acts of support, whether big or small, leave an incredible mark when you’re rebuilding your life. 

One gesture I will always remember is when a friend’s kids decided to set up a lemonade stand to help us. To our surprise, a local business matched their earnings, allowing them to raise over $1,500. It was an unforgettable reminder of how mighty the smallest acts can be. That day, lemonade was made out of life’s lemons, truly.

If someone you care about has lost their home in a fire, you might wonder how to help. I’d love to share what helped my family the most and how you can help a friend recover after a house fire. 

Why Practical Help Matters More Than You Realize 

When someone loses their home in a fire, everything changes overnight. Beyond the immediate devastation, they’re left to rebuild their lives without the comfort, tools, or objects they once had. To most people, these are just “items that can be replaced”, while certainly true, it’s also very hard to replace those favorite jeans that fit just right after years of use, or in my case, the cowboy boots that my now deceased aunt had given me.  Of course, I can go out and buy the new trendiest jeans and a beautiful pair of Old Gringo Cowboy boots, but it will never replace what I had.    

Even seemingly small tasks, such as replacing day-to-day essentials, can feel monumental when juggling trauma and insurance claims. That’s where your thoughtful support comes in, by stepping in to ease these “time sucks,” you allow them to focus on recovery. 

Create a Thoughtful Care Package 

A personalized care package full of essential items can be a lifesaver for someone who has lost their home. Think about what they use daily that they may no longer have access to. 

Items to Include in a Care Package:

First Aid Supplies 

 Don’t just stop at a basic first aid kit. Go the extra mile by adding items like Band-Aids, bandages, antibiotic ointments, antiseptic wipes, itch cream, and medications. If you’re a healthcare professional, you can customize this further with advanced items or consider holistic remedies such as lavender or peppermint oil if this would better suit your friend.

Home Pharmacy Essentials 

 Include over-the-counter medications like Tylenol, Benadryl, Tums, hydrogen peroxide, witch hazel, and rubbing alcohol. These items are often overlooked until they’re desperately needed. 

Toiletries and Hygiene Products 

 Daily hygiene essentials are difficult to stockpile when you’ve lost everything. Add toothbrushes, toothpaste, floss, tampons, and pads. These small yet significant items provide much-needed relief. 

By assembling and labeling these items in organized boxes (such as small plastic storage containers), you save your friend the time and emotional energy of finding and purchasing them on their own. 

Help Them Feel at Home Again 

Rebuilding a home goes beyond walls and furniture—it involves reconstructing a sense of comfort and security. 

Suggestions to Make Them Feel at Home:

Self-Care Items 

Consider adding soothing items to their care package, like essential oils, hand creams, or soft blankets. 

Gift Cards 

 Gift cards to grocery stores, home goods shops, or clothing outlets give them the freedom to purchase what they need most. 

Memory Replacement 

 If you have any shared photos or mementos, consider creating a small photo album or digital collection to help them regain a sense of connection to their past. 

Recipes

Write down your favorite recipes and share them with a friend. It’s a simple gesture that’s often overlooked but deeply appreciated, especially during challenging times.

Offer Emotional Support 

Rebuilding a home is one thing, but emotional recovery takes time. Be present. 

How to Offer Emotional Support:

Be a Listener 

Sometimes, just being there to listen makes the biggest impact. Allow your friend to express their feelings without judgment or rushing to solve every problem. 

Check-In Regularly 

 Losing a home can be isolating. Periodic check-ins (via text, calls, or visits) reassure them they aren’t alone. 

If Needed, Seek Professional Help 

 If the trauma feels overwhelming for both of you, offer to help connect them with a counselor or support group specializing in fire recovery. 

Small Acts, Big Impact 

If you’re part of a broader community, consider organizing collective support through Meal Trains, fundraising, or clothing drives. Clothing drives can be especially helpful for kids by requesting specific sizes. Asking for contributions can go a long way. By focusing on practical and emotional needs, your support can help a friend recover after a house fire. 

Rebuild Lives, One Step at a Time 

Supporting a friend who has experienced such a life-altering event isn’t about grand gestures. It’s about showing up consistently with care and empathy. Whether you’re putting together a thoughtful care package, helping with errands, or simply being a calming presence, your efforts will make an immeasurable difference in their recovery journey. Reach out to your friend and take the initiative to help with the grief and life transition.  

All the Best,

Malina